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everything?
Finn sat up abruptly, both arms wrapping around Rowan and
one hand sinking into his hair. Stay.
Rowan couldn t reply, because just then Finn took his mouth in
a hard kiss and took his body in an orgasm neither could escape.
Hard, mind-numbing, soul-shaking, it rippled through them like a
single living thing, not two separate bodily functions. Rowan came
harder than he d ever come before and the feel of Finn, throbbing
and jerking inside him only added to the astounding pleasure of it.
Stay& Stay& Stay& The word rang over and over in his
otherwise empty, devoid of thought mind. Stay. Could he? Did he
dare? It was an answer he didn t have.
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LETTING IN THE LIGHT
CHAPTER 11
It had been a very long night. Finn frowned and stared at his
computer screen, wondering where Rowan was. He wasn t still
sleeping Finn knew because Rowan had poked his head in earlier
to ask if he planned to eat breakfast with him. Finn had made the
excuse he had some work to do, but promised to come down for
lunch.
So, Rowan was still there.
How long, though? How long would Rowan stay before he
began thinking that leaving would be best again? A day, a week, a
month? It was funny that at the beginning, less than two weeks ago
now, he d have given his last Edgar award to get rid of the man,
and now he sat here wondering whether he had what it took to
make him stay.
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LETTING IN THE LIGHT
He pushed away from the desk and crossed to the window,
folding his arms over his chest. This was ridiculous. He ought to
just suck it up, be a man, and go ask Rowan to stay. He d asked
last night demanded to be more accurate but Rowan hadn t
promised. He hadn t disagreed with the demand, but neither had he
said, Yes, I ll stay.
::So quit being a pussy and go ask. He ll stay.::
Finn wasn t nearly as confident as his muse was.
Still, it was not his style to stand around and wait for things to
happen that he wanted. He made them happen. So he strode back
to the desk, shut off his monitor and headed off in search of his
lover.
Finn found him in the sitting room downstairs, sprawled on his
stomach on the couch with a book in hand. Finn paused in the
doorway.
What are you reading?
Rowan startled a bit and turned his head to look at Finn over
his shoulder. He smiled. You.
Me? He came over and sat down next to Rowan on the
couch, reaching out to pluck the paperback from his hand. A grin
spread across his face. The first Jacob Wilde book.
::He s got good taste::. The damn muse sounded so smug.
Rowan nodded, shaking back the shaggy hair that had spilled
across his forehead. Yeah. I figured it was time I did. I ve heard
about them from my dad for so long and now& Well, yeah. He
shrugged and took the book back, casting Finn a sideways look.
And?
Rowan lifted his brows. And what?
And what do you think? Finn would readily admit that more
important than any review or bestseller list was what Rowan
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LETTING IN THE LIGHT
thought. He hadn t been so anxious since the first time he d given
his mother a copy of his first book, waiting to hear whether she
thought he was a hack or not. This was almost worse.
Rowan beamed at him. I think it s amazing.
::Very good taste, I told you.::
Finn couldn t stop himself from remembering the other night,
when a drunken Rowan had beamed at him almost the same way
and told him he loved him& right before passing out. Finn was far
too old to be caught believing drunken men and their promises, but
he found himself wanting to believe Rowan, wanting to believe
that, drunk or not, his young lover had meant those words.
::What would you do if he did mean them, Finn? Say them
back?:: The damn muse s voice was taunting with its British
accent in his head. ::We all know the stoic Finnegan Clark doesn t
need or want anyone s love. Let alone return it, right?::
Ordinarily, and even a day or two ago, Finn would have agreed.
But last night, when Rowan had stood there in his kitchen and
announced he was leaving and not returning, Finn had come to the
belated conclusion that, despite nearly forty years of trying to be,
he wasn t an island after all. Or, if he was, his island had just
gotten another resident. One Finn wanted to make permanent.
You told me you loved me the other night.
::Smooth way to ease into the conversation.:: But for once, the
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Dobre pomysły nie mają przeszłości, mają tylko przyszłość. Robert Mallet
De minimis - o najmniejszych rzeczach.
Dobroć jest ważniejsza niż mądrość, a uznanie tej prawdy to pierwszy krok do mądrości. Theodore Isaac Rubin
Dobro to tylko to, co szlachetne, zło to tylko to, co haniebne.
Dla człowieka nie tylko świat otaczający jest zagadką; jest on nią sam dla siebie. I z obu tajemnic bardziej dręczącą wydaje się ta druga. Antoni Kępiński (1918-1972)
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