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everything is in youth. He shook his head and then his gaze found Julian s again. I
needed time. Time to come up with a plan. And time for you to wake up. These people
aren t used to hearing no. I wasn t sure I d live to see the debriefing if I told him where
he could stick his little cover-up.
Julian s heart started to beat a normal rhythm again. And? Have you come up with
a plan?
Yes. He paused for a second. But you aren t going to like it.
I have to like yours better than his.
Gates was silent for a moment. I m not the only one who has been worried about
your health.
And? Julian wanted to strangle the man for not giving him a straight answer. Out
with it, Gates.
I know you don t have the best relationship with your father, but he s been here
every day, raising hell.
Julian grimaced as he allowed himself to take a guess at Gates plan. I won t hide
behind my father s name.
I m not asking you to hide. But he has connections. Powerful ones. He could level
the playing field.
Anger heated his blood as he gave the idea serious thought. Gates had told him he
wouldn t like it, but damn. He had no idea he could hate it so much. I ve earned
everything the hard way. I m not going to start taking his handouts now.
It s not a handout. They both looked up to find Colonel Black standing in the
door.
How wouldn t it be a handout, Father? There was more acid in the word father
than he intended but he refused to apologize for it. I m in trouble and you d be using
your name and connections to get me out of it. How would this be any different than the
night you made me sit in a jail cell because I was in a car with someone who d been
drinking?
Because you weren t irresponsible with your life this time.
I don t know, trusting the military seems pretty irresponsible from where I m
sitting. Oh wait! That was your idea, wasn t it?
Yeah. It was. And I ll have to live with that guilt for the rest of my life.
I find it hard to believe you ve ever felt guilt.
I know I ve always been hard on you. It was the only way I knew how to be a
father. His dad paused as he swiped a hand over his face. But when they brought you
in you were so pale. And you wouldn t wake up. For days I ve sat, thinking about all
the time I wasted trying to be the perfect father instead of being your father. His dad
looked up at him and Julian thought he saw the sparkle of unshed tears in the man s
eyes. Almost losing your child really helps redefine your priorities.
Julian watched in disbelief as his father stepped into the room. His once-proud
posture was now hunched as if he d lived ten years in the past few days. Whatever
you need, you ve earned it from me. You earned it the moment you took your first
breath. I was just too big a fool to see it before.
It was such a huge shift in personality that Julian didn t know if he believed it. But
as his father walked over to his bed and looked down at him Julian saw the guilt in his
eyes, and years of anger and frustration melted away. He needed help. Gates needed
help. If his father was the only one willing to give it to them he d take it. They want us
to lie.
At that simple sentence the floodgates opened and he told his father everything.
When he was finished with the story, his dad nodded and then looked to Gates. I know
someone who ll help. Get some sleep, men. Tomorrow is going to be full of difficult
decisions for you both.
Julian watched his father leave in silence. He wanted to start fresh with his dad but
could he really move past the years of anger? There was so much history between them.
Could they really start over?
Gates allowed him a few minutes of thought before asking, Do you think he ll
come through?
Failure isn t an option with him. He says he ll do something, he ll do it. That was
one thing he could respect about the man. He might have high expectations but he held
himself to them as well as everyone else. His dad wasn t a hypocrite like so many in
positions of power.
And you re going to let him? Gates ran a hand over Julian s head in a comforting
stroke.
He d asked himself that very question. But when he heard it spoken, he realized
how pointless it was. I ve never been able to stop him from something once he sets his
mind to it. He sighed heavily at the truth.
Then what s wrong? Gates cupped Julian s cheek and the comforting sensation
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Dobre pomysły nie mają przeszłości, mają tylko przyszłość. Robert Mallet
De minimis - o najmniejszych rzeczach.
Dobroć jest ważniejsza niż mądrość, a uznanie tej prawdy to pierwszy krok do mądrości. Theodore Isaac Rubin
Dobro to tylko to, co szlachetne, zło to tylko to, co haniebne.
Dla człowieka nie tylko świat otaczający jest zagadką; jest on nią sam dla siebie. I z obu tajemnic bardziej dręczącą wydaje się ta druga. Antoni Kępiński (1918-1972)
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